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Change

December 21, 2006

This is basically me ranting my head off. Don’t expect you to be interested or curious. Please do skip if you want to.

You know that thing people keep saying – ‘Change is Constant’. Funda, I tell you. Really. It hit me like a sock in the jaw today. It hurt real bad.

I knew this guy way back. Say a couple of years. I say way back, because he’s changed that much. And all for bloody worse. The boy I knew was gentle, sweet, kind and very adorable. Now he’s just unrecognizable – badly behaved, ruffian types who think rude is macho. Bleargh. I thought of this for awhile and it made me sick. So I decided to let the dead past bury it’s dead, to quote.

Sometimes I wish things would change. And other times, I’d give anything to have things like they were before.

I often think if life would’ve been the way it is if somethings had stuck. If I was as combustible as I’d been four years back. If he hadn’t gone. If I hadn’t liked him*. If I still had a cellphone. If those three months hadn’t happened. If I hadn’t done some things. If I had listened when it mattered. If I had said a firm ‘No’ then. If only could take back words that I said. If shit hadn’t happened.

It’s a bad moment and a big If…
——
*The guy I liked is NOT the guy I knew way back.

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. Karthik.H permalink
    December 21, 2006 9:52 PM

    rambling about past stuff and getting nostalgic very often is something one does everyday…

    well…there are some things we wish hadn’t happened…there’s no use thinking about them is there?…all you might get is a bit angry about what you did or what others did…no use at all…

    but i think it’s kinda gud to let out ur feelings like this once in a while…

  2. Sagarohttp://gapp.wordpress.com permalink
    December 21, 2006 10:56 PM

    If only you listened to ur bro and didn’t join Venky… ๐Ÿ˜›

    Okay sorry for rubbing it in. But “This Too Shall Pass”

  3. kaushik permalink
    December 22, 2006 1:47 PM

    hey …..u sound too depressed in life!
    cheer up! ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. sharique permalink
    December 22, 2006 11:18 PM

    Well if might be ‘the big thing’ for you now but trust me its just a passing phase. Its never the case that someone is the only ‘one’! I know you cannot even imagine this because that someone was so dear to you. Its just a matter of time….everything will be alright.

    BTW invite him to the bloggers meet and then he shall get a sagaro card ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. shash permalink
    December 24, 2006 6:53 AM

    my take is all change happen to neutralize some other change (but why did the first change happen)…

    and before i forget..wish you happy change in the age column of all the forms you fill

  6. Dude Hyderabadi permalink
    December 26, 2006 6:26 PM

    People change all the time, n if u liked to somebody, change in them upto a certain limit should be overlooked, coz hey ! nobody’s perfect n it would be a bad choice to losing ppl for small complaints. May b not in this case., but in general., do give a thought to wat I said.

    Guess all those ‘ifs’ are life’s many lessons n thinking about them shud definitely be followed by learning from them. Live life… Love life ๐Ÿ™‚

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