An attempt at working both this week’s prompts ‘Torrid’ & ‘The Gamble’ at Writer’s Island - Discovered via Chennai Ramblings. [Do check her blog out, cos she writes beautifully!]
Tried writing in a Fibonacci sequence, but changed my mind mid-way and did a natural number progression instead. It’s slightly abrupt but here goes.
Hallucinations
Moonlight
Porcelain trances
A pulsating orgy
Of dangerously dancing flames
Hot cornets and torrid rhythms
Amid fervent voices chanting in sync
Lurking ominously, shadows stretch long and thin
Eyes dart, perched on a Shea tree, waiting
Too late. Foreboding peaks, you realize it’s a gamble
You can never take, an escape you can never make.
Partially inspired by Roots, one of my most favourite books.







16 comments
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March 30, 2008 at 3:35 pm
iamvisheshur
nice…you seem to have been thinking of two opposite things at the same time…and a little bit confused as to what it will come out as…i mean sure of the message but not of the order to write…
March 30, 2008 at 6:24 pm
chennairamblings
Thanks for the compliment
And good that you have entered Writer’s Island too!
I love this one, a natural progression is a great idea for this prompt!
March 30, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Suraksha
@iamvisheshur:
Thanks for dropping by!
That’s true. It was a little hard for me to streamline the thoughts and keep the meter as well. Hence, the abruptness I already mentioned.
@CR:
Anytime!
I love this one, a natural progression is a great idea for this prompt!
Yay! I’m dying to write something in your Fibonacci, though. Neat idea, that!
March 30, 2008 at 9:26 pm
shills
whoa! way to go girl! this is really nice!!
March 30, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Suraksha
@Shills:
Thanks a mil!
March 31, 2008 at 7:04 am
Jadey
Hi there You accomplished getting both torrid and gamble into a very well written poem great job.
March 31, 2008 at 8:44 am
Suraksha
@Jadey:
Thank you so much!
March 31, 2008 at 10:55 am
shills
anytime!
March 31, 2008 at 9:08 pm
Rambler
Welcome to writer’s island.
“an escape you can never make”.. this caught any eye..how many gambles we take are the ones from which there is no escape..worth thinking about
March 31, 2008 at 9:59 pm
Suraksha
@Rambler:
As for gambles and escapes, I didn’t quite think of it like you say, but yours is an interesting perspective!
Thank you.
April 1, 2008 at 12:24 am
Sharanya
Suraksha, Suraksha, I love the way you play with words…
April 1, 2008 at 4:31 am
OneMoreBeliever
a beautiful picture you have painted with words
April 1, 2008 at 5:14 am
Suraksha
@Sharan:
Hee, thanks!
@OneMoreBeliever:
Keep dropping in!
Thank you.
April 2, 2008 at 7:56 am
Tumblewords
Lovely imagery!
April 2, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Suraksha
@TumbleWords:
Thank you
April 3, 2008 at 11:24 pm
prats
This was interesting, an dthe sequence too…
Writer’s is addictive , so get ready for the ride